Greg Cohoon (drmellow) wrote,
Greg Cohoon

John Madden's Football Picks

On the heals of the Yankee/Dixie quiz meme, I offer up the following joke that my father sent me a few days ago. I'm not terribly familiar with football, so I'll just assume that the people referenced in the joke are real people that make sense if you're a football fan. I had to settle for using context clues.
John Madden was in Dallas to announce a football game one weekend when he noticed a special telephone near the Cowboys bench. He asked Quincy Carter what it was used for and was told it was a hotline to God. John asked if he could use it. Quincy told him, "Sure, but it will cost you $100." John scratched his head, then thought, what the heck, I could use some help picking games. He pulled out his wallet and paid $100. John's picks were perfect that week.

The next week John was in St. Louis when he noticed that same kind of phone on the Rams bench. He asked what the telephone was for and Marc Bulger told him, "It's a hotline to God. If you want to use it, it will cost you $500." Recalling last week, John pulled out his wallet and made the call. John's picks were ! perfect again that week.

The next weekend John was in Charlotte at Ericcson Stadium when he noticed the same kind of telephone by the Panthers bench. He asked Jake Delhomme, "Is that the hotline to God?" Jake said, "Yes, and if you want to use it, it will cost you 35 cents."

John looked incredulously at Jake and said, "Wait a second, I just paid $100 in Dallas and $500 in St Louis to use the same phone to God! Why do the Panthers only charge 35 cents?"

Jake looked at John and replied, "In the Carolinas, it's a local call."
It made me smile, anyway.

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