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I came home for lunch today, only to be greeted by more crap. Literally. I was standing on our walkway, simultaneously trimming my fingernails and admiring the awesome string-trimming job I did on the ivy that was beginning to become overgrown, when a bird crapped on my head.

That's right.

A bird crapped on my head.

I felt a thud on the top of my head and realized that a little mass had settled in my hair. I went to brush it out, thinking (hoping) that it might be a twig or something, but it was gooey and green. Yeah, bird crap. I got most of it out pretty quickly, without causing too big a mess. I hopped in the shower and washed my hair to get rid of the rest of it.

So, since I've taken two showers today, does that mean that I'm exempt from tomorrow's shower?

The real sad thing is that this is the second time this has happened to me since we moved. Well, the first time was a little before moving, but it was on this property -- we were here for some sort of inspection and a bird crapped on my shirt. That shirt is now ruined, 'cause there's a big discolored spot on it that hasn't come out, even with repeated washings.

So, I think the moral of the story is this: if you come to visit me, watch out for bird crap.

Thinking back, a bird crapped on me when I was a kid. ccohoon and I were in the back yard throwing the football back and forth when a bird crapped on my elbow. Ick.

I hate bird crap. I especially hate it when it's in my hair.

I guess this deserves a poll.

Poll #594649 Bird Crap

Has a bird every crapped on you?


Go ahead and tell your stories about bird crap here. That'll be fun.

(Userpic stolen from fettman. Thanks!)


( 13 comments — Leave a comment )
Oct. 20th, 2005 05:12 pm (UTC)
I was at Disney World. I had taken the ferry from the Wilderness Lodge to one of their smaller attractions, an island with animal exhibits. I foolishly ignored the sign at the beginning of the trail that recommended visitors wear ponchos. I had stopped at the most beautiful scene ever -- on a bridge, overlooking a flowing river, and a flock of flamingos moving down stream. The it hit me. Actually, it missed the first time, but hit the backpack I was wearing the second time.
Oct. 20th, 2005 05:17 pm (UTC)
Actually I begged for it. I was in one of those submissive phases. I deserved it, or so the bird told me. And I agreed. :)

Of note. The time that it did happen to me, it stank more than I expected.
Oct. 21st, 2005 02:22 pm (UTC)
A person dressed in a bird suit does not a bird make.
Oct. 20th, 2005 05:29 pm (UTC)
I've been crapped on by sea gulls. I used to live in Savannah, Ga. and they would terrorize us as kids.

Now, there was one time I fully expect to be crapped on, and it didn't happen. Before I saw the light, I took the place of a kindly old guy who usually took bread crumbs left over from the soup kitchen and give them to the pigeons. The old guy was sick, so I said I'd do it. It's a huuuuuge bag of crumbs.

So the pigeons swarm me, and some decide I'm not doling it out fast enough. So they land on my shoulders, arms, and head... trying to get at the crumbs.

At which point I dump the whole bag in a pile and skedaddle while doing a spastic "Get off me!" dance. Not a single pigeon crapped on me.

I should tell you some time about how a squirrel mugged me.
Oct. 20th, 2005 06:13 pm (UTC)
Squirrel's are vicious, nasty creatures.
Oct. 20th, 2005 05:37 pm (UTC)
No birds.

People, now that's a different story.

Have the best
Oct. 20th, 2005 08:16 pm (UTC)
I've never been crapped on but one time at the shore (NJ) a seagull threw a rock at me.
Oct. 20th, 2005 08:40 pm (UTC)
I got crapped on by a bird at work when I was chasing an alligator in a Florida swamp.
Oct. 20th, 2005 09:42 pm (UTC)
you're welcome.

I had a cat crap on my pant leg when I was in 4th grade.

I was lying on my stomach playing a vidja game and he laid on my leg. didn't think much of it because I let him do it all the time. but then he got up and walked off. that's when I felt something warm touch my leg. I looked and it was runny and nasty smelling. I had to take a bath to get the smell off of ME!
Oct. 21st, 2005 01:16 am (UTC)

It must be bird-crapping day. One crapped all over my car...it end ran down the back windshield in a straight line.

Oct. 21st, 2005 04:04 am (UTC)
Crap everywhere.

Hey -- I really dig that you're reading my journal. And you know that I dig reading yours. I don't know if you know about this or not, yet, but since LiveJournal bought SixApart, they've done a few things to help integrate their sites. One thing that you might be interested in is that people who don't have a LiveJournal account, but have an OpenID identity (TypeKey, e.g.) can "sign" their comments using their OpenID. So, if you've got a TypeKey identity, next time you're looking to drop a note in my LJ, try using the "OpenID" option instead of the "Anonymous" option.

If you do something with OpenID, I might even be able to make it so that you can see my "protected" posts, too. I'm not quite sure how that works yet, but I'd love to try it out.

If you haven't modified your TypeKey page since they added OpenID support, you might need to make an update of some sort to activate OpenID -- just change a field and change it back.

Anyway, check it out sometime and let me know if it works!
Oct. 21st, 2005 11:47 am (UTC)
Oops, I mean SixApart bought LJ.
Oct. 21st, 2005 02:48 am (UTC)
not yet anyway
That's the event in life I'm most paranoid about, and it hasn't even happened to me once. I am constantly watching out for birds flying over my path when I'm walking around.
( 13 comments — Leave a comment )

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