Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results Of 2008 Election Early

Feb. 26th, 2008 at 8:52 AM

"This country is based on the fantasy that the government is the voice of the people."

-Ernie Kenilworth, Director of Public Relations, Diebold, Inc.

Since the fix is already in, feel free to write me in for your vote -- I'm anti-DST, pro-Fair Tax, and anti-histamine.

Comments

( 11 comments — Leave a comment )

meep

Feb. 26th, 2008 02:21 pm (UTC)

You know, your platform is the perfect storm for pushing ahead in the polls in late March - mid April.

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drmellow

Feb. 26th, 2008 02:23 pm (UTC)

I was just looking at the calendar yesterday and thinking the same thing. Hopefully I can capitalize on that and build up some momentum. I let the last clock change slip by without bringing enough attention to the issue. Combined with a likely increased pollen count next month, followed by tax day the month after, I think you're right -- I need to strike!

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christtrekker

Feb. 26th, 2008 02:31 pm (UTC)

Might as well vote for you. I don't see anybody else so far that's worth a hill of beans.

I won't be running for Congress this year.

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drmellow

Feb. 26th, 2008 02:35 pm (UTC)

That's a big reason why I'm running this write-in campaign. There is absolutely no one out there who even comes close to being worth voting for, in either of the two main parties. Since this is the first year I'm eligible to hold the office, I'm going for it.

My goal is to get at least 100 write-in votes, scattered among at least 5 states. I think we can do it. Tell your friends, get the word out.

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meep

Feb. 26th, 2008 02:57 pm (UTC)

Man, I'm too young to run this year, but given you have the core platform covered, it would be redundant for me to enter the race.

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drmellow

Feb. 26th, 2008 02:58 pm (UTC)

You can be in my cabinet and I'll groom you to be my successor.

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christtrekker

Mar. 3rd, 2008 06:54 pm (UTC)

This is the first year I'm eligible for president, too, but I don't see myself as an executive. That's why my eye's been on Congress instead.

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drmellow

Mar. 3rd, 2008 07:14 pm (UTC)

If you were in NC, I'd vote for you.

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sidelobe

Feb. 28th, 2008 02:43 am (UTC)

This is an absolutely brilliant bit of reporting.

I'll vote for you. DST and time zones in general are completely out of hand. We found this morning that your manager's Blackberry doesn't know what time zone it's in, and it won't even tell you where it thinks it is. Nightmare.

Will you appoint me to your cabinet? I think I can run the Internet better than Al Gore. Goodness knows it needs a steady hand at the helm.

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